Nodus Tollens
by professionalcryptid
Summary: The moment she's lucid enough to think, Daria Midori comes to two conclusions: 1) she's screwed, and 2) she's so, so screwed. Naruto SI/OC. M for language. Sporadic updates.


Nodus tollens: n. the realization that the plot of your life doesn't make sense to you anymore

* * *

She remembers bleary eyes and and an interesting post. She remembers the screeching of tires and the honking of horns, remembers blinding white pain, remembers shouts that sounded so, so far away.

Unfortunately (she thinks), that's about all she remembers of that incident. Maybe if she could focus, she'd know more, but her first… few… unidentifiable periods of time are, at best, sleep filled hazes. Any moments that could even generously be called waking were spent panicking and wondering where she was, what had happened, why she couldn't move or see or talk.

The moment she was lucid enough to think, Daria Midori came to two conclusions: 1) she was screwed, and 2) she was so, so screwed.

That moment is a long time coming, though. If she had to guess, she'd say she was around a year old. There were little, subtle hints before that, but she wasn't nearly aware enough to recognize them.

From the stimuli she could interpret, she knew this: there was a kind woman with light brown hair and olive green eyes, as well as an elderly man and a full-figured older woman, who she thought took care of her. She also knew that there were other people around. If the pitch of their voices was anything to go by, they were children, but they weren't speaking any language she knew.

Was she in a children's hospital, or something? She supposed she was young enough to be put into one, and the memories she had of whatever happened to her certainly made her think she'd been in some kind of accident. Maybe, if she was in some kind of semi-coma, or something, that explained why she was always so tired, and why nothing made sense.

Eventually, she became less tired, but even more confused, which mostly proved her hypothesis wrong. What she saw- people that looked like priests, and what she thought was Japanese (or, at least, East Asian) architecture- absolutely boggled her mind. She tried to ask, but for some reason she could barely speak, and the people around her just spoke in what she thought was Japanese, which didn't make sense at all, because she'd never been to Japan.

Another thing that didn't make sense: she now appeared to be about two inches tall. Well, not really, but she certainly felt like it. She'd never been tall, persay, but she was at least five foot two, and she definitely didn't come to peoples' knees. She'd also had fine motor control, though, so she guessed she really shouldn't be comparing whatever this was to the past.

Speaking of whatever this was, what ever was this? She'd ruled out being in a Japanese children's hospital, but she was still confused as fuck. The architecture was wrong, the language was wrong, the writing was wrong her body was wrong, everything was wrong. She must, she eventually concluded, be in some kind of coma. Not a semi-coma, like she'd thought before, but a full on, completely-isolated-from-the-real-world coma. And if she was in a coma, then that meant this was a coma dream. There! All her problems were solved.

Well, not really. But the hard questions, like how the fuck she'd replicated a language she'd never even learned, went ignored. If it ain't broke, don't fix it, right?

More time passed. She learns her new name, Daria Midori (why her mind comes up with a new name, she doesn't ask). The brunette is Mother, the heavy-set woman is Sister, and the elderly man is Father. She thinks it's kind of weird, naming people after nouns. Then she learns that her name literally means green dahlia, and she thinks she's just uncreative.

Time continues to pass. She makes tentative friends with a boy named Urushi, who has a large birthmark on his nose. Something niggles at the back of her mind, but it goes ignored, until Mother tells her that she's living in the Konoha Orphanage.

If you had a camera, you could've taken a picture of the exact moment Daria Midori knew she was fucked.

* * *

This likely isn't going to be a regular thing, or a very well thought out thing, or a very well written thing. I just had an idea, and I figured I might write it down, and then I figured I might post it. Constructive criticism is always welcome, but I didn't really put any effort into making this coherent.

If you want something you can actually read, you might want to check out my other story, Light Your Own Fire. I actually put effort into that one, and the chapters are a couple thousand words long.


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